It was just a bad joke, a very bad joke."Laura was sobbing hopelessly in my arms weakly struggling to get away and run. April fell on the bed sobbing. "Mommy," she wailed. "I didn't mean it! I don't want to do anything to hurt you! I need you! I love you! Please, please, please, forgive your daughter! Please, Mom!" She was lying over me with her arms around Laura. Both of them were sobbing. May came around behind Laura and helped hold her while we all cried.After many endless minutes, things quieted down. I said in a stern voice. "All three of you will listen to me and say nothing."Laura, I love you and want you with me. Do you believe that? I believe that God has brought us together and will bless our union. Do you believe that?" She nodded though the tears continued to fall. "April, I haven't spanked you since you were about four and a half. I haven't decided about today yet. Don't you remember Thursday when you had to hold Laura to keep her from bolting? Think about that and the. And did he think of me during all those years? Like I thought of him? How many nights did he fall asleep, his hands holding his erection, wishing it were my hand holding him? As many as I did, using my fingers to ease the pain I felt from not having his body on mine, his hardness inside me where it belonged? All those years lost, the nights we could have been together, making love like we did before it all went to hell. Before I destroyed it all with my stupidity.And what made it even worse for me was that the last man inside me, the last man to have my body wasn't even my husband! It was Hugo! The man that I let destroy my marriage and send the man I love to prison! Hugo! Even now, that thought makes me sick. Sick at heart as well as sick to my stomach. When the memory surfaces, as it does on those days when the world seems to have it in for me, I end up on the floor in the bathroom, still wet from the shower that never seems to make me feel clean. And regardless of what they say,.
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